March 13, 2010

I am so tired of being sad. It just seems that every time I start singing to the radio again I get news of another friend suffering. Just last week a friend's son was working on a van for a friend. The jack that held the van slipped and the weight of the vehicle crushed the 19 year old to death. What a terrible accident. No one should have to bury their child. I couldn't bring myself to go to the funeral of the young man. I feel terrible about it. But I just couldn't deal with the sadness of it. While the mom is a friend, we are more acquaintances through a mutual friend, so I know that my presence was not missed, but I should have gone.

The very next day I read on Facebook that yet another friend has passed on after a "short battle with cancer". The memorial for my friend is tomorrow. I will be going to that one.

Yet another good friend - also last week - lost a brother. He was only in his fifties and died in his sleep. Probably from an infection.

And then I read last night on MLive that a lady I worked with many years ago passed away from cancer.

Is this what it is like to get old? What happened to things happening in threes?

I need spring. I need daffodils sprouting from the snow saturated ground. I need tulips and sunshine. Open windows. Heavy bass booming from the cars driving by the park. A sign that there is life after death. I need to be able to blog about happy things.

I'm just tired of being sad all of the time.