Elephants Suck

What do you say to someone when you know they are going to die? Do you walk around the elephant or do you look it in the eye? J is 36 years old and is married and has two young children - 6 years old and 11 years old. A few months ago he went to the doctor because he was having a lot of headaches. He was diagnosed with inoperable brain cancer. Originally the doctors told him he would only live 3 to 6 months. But a second opinion gave some hope as that doctor was willing to perform surgery. About 4 months later he went back to work on a part time basis with the hopes of eventually working up to full time. Unfortunately the headaches started up again and his doctor told him no more working after today. I had to talk to him about his benefits and vacation pay and disability and whatever else needed to be covered. He basically told me that people with his type of cancer live from 1 to 5 years. His biggest fear is that he will be leaving his children without a father so he is worried about them. I honestly did not even know what to say. I have a daughter and I can't even imagine the pain of knowing that I was going to leave her. We were talking on the phone, as he lives in North Carolina, so he could not see the tears coming down my face. This just plain sucks. I know all about the "plan" and all that...but it still sucks!